Bry lectures the entitled youth, ‘heard around the Walter cooler’, new feature ‘Brian Quinn’s Broad Thoughts’. Music: Court Jester – “”Hollywood Girl””
“I consider Comic Book Men high art!” – Walt
“I don’t consider Impractical Jokers art.” – Q
“That’s not da piana man I useda know!” – Walt as Q
“I was talking about your toothless elf from Collingwood.” – Bry about Gitem
“Stacy was very concerned by the tooth ache, she’s like ‘I don’t know what to do. Johnson doesn’t give me any pages and I’m getting tooth ache excuses from Mr. Oz.” – Q
“Suzanne while you’re up can you get me some blood and an IV?” – Bry
“I know they’re good for the environment but I just want to push them over!” – Bry about electric cars.
- Natural Jizzaster: A 16 year old masturbates 42 times in a row and dies
- Ali Baba and the 40 million dollars of Illegal Downloads: An Afghani musical artist says that digital piracy is worse than the Taliban.
- Fickle Fingers of Fate: Iggy Azelea will no longer crowd surf due to unwanted digits inserted in her.
Q’s Broad Thoughts: Hobby Lobby denying to pay for contraceptives and abortions.
Bryan can’t wait for Q to debut Q’s Broad Thoughts to watch him crash and burn if it turns ugly.
Ming has finished writing his raps for #200: The Bicentennial Battle and is worried he went too “Nuclear”.
Q updates about Claymation footage he has seen from Mr. Oz. Walt jokes about having to set the release date to 2019 for how long it’s taking.
Bry is rolling after his blood transfusion, feeling spry. Ming has been way too interested in Bryan’s testosterone and boner situation, it has been the sole topic of conversation on his new podcast.
Bry talks about millenials misusing gofundme.com as a way to get out of debt.
Q discusses being in crippling debt in his 20s and how he dragged himself out of it. Walt also admits to being in debt to J.C. Penny who was the only place that would give him a credit card.
Q goes to see Sebastian Bach in concert. Sebastian tells his over exuberant guitarist to tone it down when he is outshining him. Walt remembers a time his sister saw Bach at a grocery store looking at a magazine that had him on the cover.
Bry wants to wait until the Testopellet kicks in so he can bang the Zen Librarian to rub it in Ming’s face.
Q thinks his plumber is a hero for digging shit out of a toilet with only a thin latex glove on, but then disturbed when he tries to pet his cat.
Q recalls an ex girlfriend who did not support Q’s creative process of going over to Sal’s to write material and play video games for hours.
Bry discovers Jamaican “Dagger” dancing that is resulting in penile fractures across the country.
Hollywood Girl by Court Jester