TESD presents: A Small Fistful of Dollahs

Pod Description:

The award-winning podcast Tell ‘Em Steve Dave brings you four of the most righteous, grooviest tales of the flyest, dopest baadasssss albino bruthah that ever was and ever will be! From the creators of the Audible best-selling Fair-re-re Tale Theater, join us on an adventure through time and space.

Host/Guest:

Bryan Johnson

Walt Flanagan

Brian Quinn

Sunday Jeff

Mike Zapcic

Ming Chen

Frank #3

Frank #5

Git ‘Em Steve-Dave

Brian Maxwell

Marc Costello

Sargel18

Troy

Mentioned Person:

Quotes:

“Better get busy livin’ or get busy dyin'” – Dollah Shave, repeated

“Oh my lord, that cooch is so hairy it look like Toto be hanging out of it” – Dollah

“Respect Dollah, Respect his money!” – Ho

“Hi, my name is Ming.  I’m on the tv.  I like to podcast.  I’m a famous boy” – Possessed Ming

“Your dumbass partner asked the devil for fame but forgot to ask for the talent to go along with it.”  – Dollah

“I’m bout to show you why they call Dollah an Ass-tral man” – Dollah

“The only ass Dollah cares about is the ass he gonna get, not the ass he already got” – Dollah

Memorable Moments:

This is the feature length radio play starring Sunday Jeff as Dollah Shave.

The story begins in 1945 Germany where a defeated Hitler tries to make his escape.  Dollah Shave appears from the future to make sure that doesn’t happen.  Dollah realizes his mission was to kill Adolf as a baby to make sure the holocaust didn’t happen, but instead goes medieval on the adult Hitler.

Dollah Shave returns to TESDtown after many years.  He visits We Three Franks House of Glamour ran by Franks #2, #3 and #5 who are finishing up styling Wolf from “Shane:  Heir to the Throne”.  The Franks not knowing who their new customer really is start telling him how TESDtown has gone downhill after the departure of Dollah Shave.  None of the Franks can agree on the true story of how and why Dollah Shave left TESDtown.

Tale #1:  One Christmas Dollah is watching Wizard of Oz with two hos when Mike Zapcic shows up looking for Dollah’s help.  Mike says his partner Ming has been possessed by the devil and needs Dollah to do an exorcism.   Ming is possessed by the devil because he made a deal for fame but didn’t ask for talent to go along with it.  Dollah uses a mind meld to enter Ming’s subconscious to try to locate Ming’s soul.  Inside Ming’s subconscious Dollah is distracted by visions of Q, Walt, and Mike skewed by Ming’s impressions of them.  Not finding Ming’s soul Dollah has to try and draw the devil out by offering himself as a prize if Beezlebob can answer the riddle of the Mini Golf Course.  Beezlebob can not deal with the nonsense and gives up Ming, Dollah makes a deal with the devil that he can have his soul if he promises to leave Earth for good.

Tale #2:  Dollah Shave escapes from prison, and as he runs through the woods comes upon a strange cabin in the woods.  Dollah enters the cabin and comes face to face with SargeL 18 who tells him he is the next step in human evolution and he needs to bring peace to all the universes and fight aliens led by Lucifer.  SargeL and Dollah combine their powers becoming one entity to fight off the aliens.  With the combined might of ShaveL 18 the aliens and Lucifer are defeated, but the host body that formerly held the mojo of Dollah Shave is now a normal man called Jeff.  Mike and Ming find the disoriented Sunday Jeff in the cabin and take him back to Red Bank to get a job at the Stash.

Tale #3:  President Maxwell is giving a state of the union address when he is interrupted by the sound of loud sex next door.  He enters the oval office to see the First Lady with Dollah Shave.  The outraged president has Dollah and his wife sent to Area 51 for imprisonment.  Dollah is put in a cell with an alien named Kranu from planet Gitem.  Dollah and Kranu come up with a plan to escape Area 51 using Kranu’s space ship after Dollah seduces the female guards.  After flying away in Kranu’s saucer, the alien tries to probe Dollah.  Dollah manages to hit the ship’s self destruct saying he’d rather die than take it up the pooper.

Tale #4:  Dollah goes to a store called the VHS Graveyard to pick up a copy of Star Wars for a Christmas present for his mother-in-law.  While waiting for the clerk to go find the tape Dollah’s ex-parole officer Bexley enters the store.  Bexley murders the clerk and frames Dollah for the crime before incapacitating him with a stun gun.  When Dollah wakes up he discovers a second head has been sewed onto his body, that of Sunday Jeff.  Jeff and Dollah bond over their love of 70s women in prison films.  Walt reveals himself to be the one responsible for Dollah and Jeff being sewn together after witnessing Mike and Ming in the Stash basement in a position that made it look like one man with two heads.  Walt wants the new Dollah/Jeff creature to answer the phone at the Stash so he doesn’t have to deal with customers.

The tacked on bonus pod at the end where Walt Bry and Q read Sunday Jeffs first version of “The Cabin”.  Walt is flabbergasted Sunday Jeff would write about Dollah going full on prison rape on Ming Chen and Mike Zapcic.

 

One thought on “TESD presents: A Small Fistful of Dollahs

  1. Pingback: #218: Poof Bomb – TESD Wiki

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