Walt proves his metaldom at a young age. Bry brings a Christmas tale of abject shittiness.
Pre-recorded Brian Quinn
“Ey, I gotta request, Blaze of Glory. I’m goin’ in, I don’t care what it is” – Walt as Q
“I had my KISS poster, my KISS shirt, I wrote KISS on my hand.” – Walt
“I’m not looking to kiss any girls, I’m not gay I’m metal!” – Bry as young Walt
“She was wearing black stockings, it looked like Jack Skellington making his way down to the stage.” – Walt about his daughter Alicia.
“This guy is getting the moment that Alicia was waiting for.” – Walt about random Comic Book Men fan.
“Cuz you’re like, you wanna get home I gotta smoke some weed” – Walt as the fan.
“After the ride up here I gotta stop on the way home and get a rock.” – Walt
“I got the male Nancy Reagan in my face.” – Bry
“What am I some buck-toothed fucktard? Of course I smoke up!” – Bry as Walt.
“My teeth are like this because I smoke TOO much grass.” – Walt
“See if it has tits! Oh it’s got a couple of things dangling down here. I’ll be happy with whatever I find. I’m horny and dying for a joint!” – Bry as Q
“It’s like Samson and Delilah out there isn’t it?” – Walt
Trolling the audience with 98% less Q, Bry and Walt address prerecorded clips of Q as though he was in the room.
Walt takes his youngest daughter Alicia to a music festival in New York to see her favorite artist, Nicole Dollanganger. Walt’s Tom Tom keeps trying to get him to turn down one way streets. Alicia wants to have a special moment with Nicole and gift her with the special painting and wood box she had made for her. Walt comments how Alicia is really talented as an artist. Alicia waits by the merch table all night until finally getting her moment. While waiting Walt meets a Comic Book Men fan who assumes all Walt wants to do is go home and smoke weed. Walt also spies an androgynous “Bowie-type” person who is passed out on the floor.
Walt is so anti-drug he hasn’t even had a prescription from a doctor in 20 years.
In one of Walt’s first instances of Brady worship he tells of a young child who gets Tom’s jersey number etched in his skull during brain surgery. Tom invites the kid to watch a game on the sidelines.
Some lady wanted the Comic Book Men to attend her child’s birthday party in North Carolina for free.
Pastor Dave, a crazy street preacher, ruins Christmas in Texas by telling all the kids present that Santa Claus isn’t real. Texas parents don’t take it well.
Walt takes his family to see Rudolph live on Broadway and marvels at the flying reindeer and the 20 foot Bumble.