Games & Reoccurring Segments

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Games

One True Three

#019: For those about to rock

#020: Shure To Displease

#022: The Uninvited Part II

#026: Lt. Dan vs. El Jefe

Benefit Podcast for Brendan Morocco

#029: Houston, We’re F’d

#031: C’est La Vie

#036: Night Of 1000 Stars

Adam and Eve Bonus Pod

#045: Dallas Live

Puck Nuts Bonus Pod

The Worst Episode Ever

Overkill #6: Of Our Elaborate Plans, The End.

#100: Rock ‘N Roll Farmer

#117: Q The Cuddle Bear

TESD XMAS 2012

Fiasco Pod (Cryptoman Bundle)

#251: The Peyton Manning of Podding

#264: The Blue Juice Comics 1 True 3 Invitational Part 1

#265: The Blue Juice Comics 1 True 3 Invitational Part 2

NYC Podfest 2016: The Long Burn

#371: Daddy Edgar

#500: It’s The Big One

Two Live Crew or One Middle Aged Jew

#302: evaD evetS me’ lleT

#329: Log Box

#500: It’s The Big One

Dyslexia

#302: evaD evetS me’ lleT

#308: The 2016 Overdose Full Special

TESD XMAS 2016

The Cochlear Album

#355: The 2017 Overdose Full Special

TESD XMAS 2017: Space Monkeys Save Christmas

#371: Daddy Edgar

#391: The 2018 Halloween Special: The Colored Cadre Cometh

The 2020 TESD XMas Special – The Christmas K.I.S.S.

#500: It’s The Big One

#534: The 2022 TESD Halloween Spooktacular

Are You Worse Than Hitler

Host is judge, jury and executioner and will rule on who wins the game. The criteria for answers will not be given, as contestants will give completely honest opinions. The player with the correct opinion will be ruled worse than Hitler and the winner of the game.

#116: Tales from the Chocolate Fountain

Cryptozoic Man Bonus Pod

What’s On the Menu

A notoriously picky eater, Walt will list several food items and the players must guess which among them he has actually eaten.

#043: The Unkindest Cut

Overkill #6: Of Our Elaborate Plans, The End.

#500: It’s The Big One

#534: The 2022 TESD Halloween Spooktacular

Sake to Ming

In this Newlywed Game inspired game Walt asks questions to the contestants significant others and then asks the players what they believe their partners answered.

Fiasco Pod (Cryptoman Bundle)

Back Issue Bunk

Three comic book titles are presented to the contestants by the host, only one of which is real. Two of the titles are narrowed down by the contestants though a series of three questions. Which ever contestant picks the real book wins.

#059: Right Said Ming

I Fought the Law and the Law One

Walt explains several strange or antiquated laws and the players must guess which laws are true and which Walt had made up.

#042: Joseph, No!

#067: The Horse Wackerer

#376: Trash Purgatory

The 2020 TESD XMas Special – The Christmas K.I.S.S.

Rotten Wieners, Stinky Clams

Bryan leads this game where he lists several horrifying murders and the players must guess if the perpetrator is a Man, a rotten wiener, or Woman, a stinky clam.

#075: Australian Buttocks Soup

Rant or Ruse

Walt shows the players three commercials which he claims sent him into a hateful tirade against the makers of the commercial.  The players must guess which of these Rants are legitimate and which are merely a Ruse.

#101: Two Deviants And A Dolt

#307: BQ+BM=TLF

#354: Overbites Matter

You Don’t Ming Me Flowers

The object of the game is to keep a florist on the line as long as possible as you dictate what should go on the card.  The opposing team writes what the card should say, making it as heinous as possible in the hopes to cause the florist to hang up in disgust.  Whoever keeps the florist on the line the longest wins.

#157: Let The Games Begin

TESD XMAS 2016

What Would Sunday Jeff Do

In this game the players must correctly guess which of the three responses was Sunday Jeff’s real reaction  to an interview question given by Walt.

#152: Respect My Money

Cryptozoic Man Bonus Pod

TESD XMAS 2016

#355: The 2017 Overdose Full Special

High Low

Walt will make a statement including a numerical statistic, I.E. How many people have died due to Black Friday shopping since 1980,  and the player or team whose turn it is will guess a value.  The opposing player or team will guess if the real statistic is either higher or lower than the number quoted by the other team.

The 2020 TESD XMas Special – The Christmas K.I.S.S.

Roll a Role

A 1970s church approved improvational board game where the players roll dice to be assigned roles to act out a dramatic or tense scene.

TESD XMAS 2015

#278: Brian Quinn Goes Cruisin’

#279: Brian Quinn has the Sniffles

TESD Live at The Gramercy Theater

 Vapid Fire

In this game Walt takes quotes from celebrities who are considered vapid and quotes from Ming Chen. The players are given one quote at a time and are tasked with discerning who it is attributed to. In the first appearance of the game the quotes were pulled from Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian

#248: Q’s Grand Day

That’s Gitemtainment

In this call-in game Bry and Q play for listeners as they try to guess what movie quote or song Gitem is performing.

#267: The Three Horsemen

#275: Quinn Returns to Port

#534: The 2022 TESD Halloween Spooktacular

Are You Horny?

Walt lists several bizarre sexual fetishes.  The players must guess which of the fetishes are true documented fetishes or invented by Walt.

#053: Fibber McChen Part II

Rap Battle

Opponents go Head to Head rapping insults at each other.  A panel of Judges grade them to determine the winner.

#158: Do You Believe In Miracles?

#200: The Bicentennial Battle

TESD XMAS2014

The 2020 TESD XMas Special – The Christmas K.I.S.S.

Eating Contest

The competitors must eat the most of a foul food in a set time limit.

#078: WallyWood Squares

#158: Do You Believe In Miracles?

Silly Crackerz

Due to Polish Russian Roulette being pulled by the powers that be Walt comes up with a game taking on the only safe targets these days,  White Men.

#118: Big Bry and the inhumanoids

One True Three Go!!

Walt provides the players with three sports and their descriptions and they must guess which of the outlandish games is true.

#128: Tell ‘Em Puck Nuts

It Don’t Ming a Thing if You Ain’t Got that Swing

Walt reads a list of terms used in the swinger lifestyle and the contestants must guess the definition of the term.  Walt judges who is closer and awards a point

#372: King of Swing

The Frank and Candid Quotes Game

Walt reads a quote from either Frank Sinatra, Frank Zappa, or Frank Miller and the players must guess who said it.

#373: Number 5 is Alive

One True Tweet

Chris Laudando reads as series of tweets from a TESD alumni.  The contestants must pick the real tweet.

#374: Johnson Being

Are You Normal

Walt gives the contestants 3 real life scenarios from his life ranging from the mundane to the insane and gauges their answers to how they would handle it compared to how the Most Normal Man In The World actually reacted.

#444: Four Colors For Life

Comics Trivia

Walt questions Q and Bry about comic book trivia.  Q’s questions come from general knowledge where Bry’s questions are only about books that he has personally written.

#451: I Buy Comics

Reoccurring Segments

Space Monkeys

When Walt is away the Space Monkeys will play.  Bry and Q host this TESD offshoot where they can take on hot button topics.

Space Monkeys

#091: Cindy’s Fuck Truck

#106: Space Monkeys – Mosier And Vulcano

#113: What Mafia?

#115: Horny in the Pants

#134: Space Monkeys Style

#136.5: Don’t Call Me Mustache, Krampus

#159: Bitchfest 2013

#192: Ratchet Ho

#201: The Staten Island Unicorn

#247: Bitchin’ n moanin’

#278: Brian Quinn Goes Cruisin’

#279: Brian Quinn has the Sniffles

#311: Peepin’ N Creepin’

Baron Von Flanagan

Walt dons his cape and top hat to tell spine tingling facts to blow your minds.  THUNDER CLAP

#162: FIVE A$$HOLES?!?!

#164: B-Hole

#165: Shitmouth

#173: Would You Like a Corn Muffin?

#214: The Magnifying Glass

#250: Schramy! Schramy! What has become of you?

Tell ‘Em Steve​-​Dave! 289

#342: The Rebranding of Baron Von Flanagan

#347: Get’em the Hell Outta Here!

#361: Git ‘Em Dies at the End

TESD Live at The Gramercy Theater

Overkill

What once began as a 16 episode Zune exclusive breaks into TESD proper when Walt Bry and Q bring forward mysterious tales of the unknown.

#111: Firebugs & Bedwetters

#120: Double-O Q and the Honey Boo Boo  Segment on the Goat Man

#138: My Sweet Satan

#193: Heil Honey Segment on Ghost Ships

#208: Moon Fever  Segment on the Doggie Suicide Bridge

#210: Sweet Dreams

#273: The Quinn Who Saw Tomorrow

#280: Petting the Invisible Dog

#284: The Stoolening Two: God’s Anus

#288: Bat Boy Lives

#291: What’s Behind the Green, Red, Blue and Yelluh Door?

#295: I’ll Fly when I’m Dead

#303: Polaroid from Dimension Z

#313: 4th and Down

#319: Nostradummies

#325: Ignorance is Holy

#333: Sunday Jeffosauraus

#337: Kwigleeuh

#341: Spooky Puss

#342: The Rebranding of Baron Von Flanagan

#348: Time Commander in Chief

#351: NO MANGO

TESD Live at The Gramercy Theater

#365: Nobody’s Goat

#380: The Declan Cut Sucks

#445:  Overkill:  Kissing the Prussian Devil

Pusshole of the Week

Bryan Johnson declares someone who has acted unmanly or cowardly to be the Pusshole of the Week

12 Minutes in Hell

Walt and Gitem sit down for a short mini podcast at the end of an episode where an ad has played too close to the end of the show in order to act as filler.

Booty Time

A promotional opportunity for Secret Stash merchandise.

Fat News

Bryan scours the internet finding larger than life stories.

#446:  The TESD Father’s Day Blowout

You Hitlearn Something New

Also known as Furher Information.  Walt brings up bizarre or degrading news stories about Adolf Hitler.

#193: Heil Honey

#195: The Disappearance of Episode One Ninety-Four

#196: Q Does the Right Thing…Kinda

#202: Retarded Ejaculation

#204: The All-New Bank of Tears

#212: P-Doggy, Puppies and Puzzling Investments

#218: Poof Bomb

#228: Heav-ant Can Wait

#243: Brian Quinn: Time Gigolo

#248: Q’s Grand Day

#249: Skinny, Thin and Slim

#281: Dis Nut

#283: Stoolburger in Paradise

#291: What’s Behind the Green, Red, Blue and Yelluh Door?

#319: Nostradummies

#334: Shave and a haircut

#336: Mushken

#358: F*ck the trees!

#368: King Me

#446:  The TESD Father’s Day Blowout

#482:  In Praise of Bear Girl

#483:  A Joy Ride in Space

Heard Around the Walter-Cooler

A reoccurring segment where Walt presents three provocative headlines to news stories you could theoretically tell around the water-cooler at an office while on break. Bry and Q pick one of the stories they want to hear and Walt proceeds to tell it.

#187: The Death of an Ant Part 2

#188: Diarrhea Corn

#199: They’s ig’nant!

#208: Moon Fever

#261: The Sunday Jeff Show II

#371: Daddy Edgar

I Sell Comics Song Contest

Walt wrote song lyrics to a song called I Sell Comics and was asking listeners to come up with the music to accompany it.

I SELL COMICS

What manner of creature stands behind this counter
Man or machine is the big mystery
and with every transaction I cement my place in history.

My fingers dance over the register keys leaving your mouth agape
and it’s not ’cause I make King Kong look like just another ape
but it’s just another sale to this comics-selling alpha male.

CHORUS
I could sell comics to a blind man
a Wednesday warrior through and through
and you’ll buy everything I tell you to.
I sell comics baby. Comics baby. Comics baby. Oooooooo…..Yeahhhhhhhh

GUITAR SOLO

In WW two the allies kicked nazi ass and Hitler sobbed nein, nein, nein
Just like my competition when they hang that going out of business sign.

REPEAT CHORUS

Song ends with register sounds, drawer opening/closing

Courage My Love’s Version

Jay Solinas’ Version

Trial by Fire…. Ants

“In the TellEm’ Steve Dave Town justice system the ants are represented by two separate but equally important people: Troy, who investigates crimes, and Walt, who prosecutes the offenders.  Or sometimes GitEm prosecutes the offenders and Troy wonders what he’s doing there in the first place.  These are their stories. “

In this segment a TESD town resident who has been accused of wrongdoing must stand before a judge and plead their case.

#237: Tears of the Weeping Ant, Chris “Ghost Pussy” Laudando

Judge:  Brian Quinn

Prosecutor:  Walt Flanagan and Bryan Johnson

Defendant:  Chris Laudando

#322: My Cousin Quinny Part I and #323: My Cousin Quinny Part II

Judge:  Bryan Johnson

Prosecutor:  Gitem SteveDave

Defendant:  Brian Quinn

Defense Attorney:  Walt Flanagan

Bailiff:  Brian Maxwell

Witnesses:  Mike Zapcic, Ming Chen, Simmy, Chris Laudando,